If you’ve ever found yourself in the reception line at a wedding and the couple blinks at you blankly when you congratulate them, you understand what an overdone wedding is.

It’s embarrassing.

For everyone.

The bride and groom feel foolish that they don’t know who on Earth you are.

Whoever insisted that you receive and invitation feels sheepish because, apparently, you wouldn’t have been missed.

And, of course, you are mortified because it appears that you came simply for the cake and punch.  Most adults cringe at the thought of being labeled as a ‘mooch’.  You begin to wonder if the gift you brought was expensive enough to redeem your reputation and if the gift tag is still firmly affixed to the wrapping.

On the flip side of things, if a couple has a small, intimate ceremony of less than fifty people, you know that your invitation was intentional.  You are wanted.  Their joy wouldn’t be complete without you.

*sigh* How affirming.

Your expensive, thoughtful, or home-made gift will be appreciated and considered with fondness.  Your slice of cake will be generous.  You may even end up with a picture of the newlyweds and yourself!

But enough about you…

The only people who have a right to be at a wedding are the bride and groom.  (No, parents, you’re there because you’re wonderful or because of guilt).  You are there to shine with happiness for the husband and wife.  And if you do this well, you’ve made their day even more poignant, memorable, and radiant.  You’ve given them the first golden moment in their life together.

And, yeah, and the bride and groom will know who you are.